| Table of Contents Page 1 – Introduction Page 1 – Being Cabin Crew Page 2 – Behind the Galley Curtain Page 2 – What a Great Company Page 2 – Employee Mental Health Page 3 – Working Well, Living Better Page 4 – Ex-Police Officer Bart Being Cabin Crew | The Ugly Truth Part 2 |
Introduction
Having spent my entire working life as Cabin Crew, I was made redundant in 2020 because of the impact the Covid-19 pandemic had on the industry.
Despite being on long-term sick leave at the time, I knew when redundancies were announced that I was about to lose my job.
In this company, which I joined in 1990, at 23 years old, diversity and inclusion are promoted as core values. These two words appear in virtually every manifesto, policy manual and advertising campaign.
This is a business where everyone can be themselves and thrive within a supportive community. They state that diversity, equity, and inclusion lead to an environment of growth, innovation, and “liberated thinking.”
This is an organisation where everyone belongs, or that’s what they want you to believe. However, behind the veil of corporate rhetoric, it was a very different story.
After thirty years of loyal service, doing a job that I loved and did well, I suddenly became entangled in a web of lies, deception and bullying. In the twelve months that followed, I fought a battle that, unknown to me at the time, I had no chance of winning. The people dealing with this matter were supposed to uphold the company’s values, but were instead violating them in a way that’s difficult to comprehend.
This is not just a story of workplace bullying but a testament to the human cost of corporate hypocrisy and the enduring resilience of someone who refused to be silenced. This incredible story involves brand-new employees and people in the highest positions in the company.
Using the original documentation, I will recount the harrowing reality of what I was put through after writing developmental performance feedback on a new employee still in his probationary period. This person, who was an ex-police officer, had been with the company for just eleven months.
Despite my thirty years with this airline, nineteen as an Inflight Cabin Manager, I was thrown out like a piece of rubbish, stripped of everything I had worked for, and left with absolutely nothing. While I faced the consequences of a fictitious grievance raised by a crooked ex-police officer, he and those who supported his lies, one of whom was his fiancée, continued with their lives as if nothing had happened.
My life has been destroyed by what took place, and five years on, I’m still struggling with my mental health and have not been able to move on from what took place and rebuild my life.
Having joined this airline in 1990 as a Junior Flight Attendant, I was promoted to Purser in 1996 and to Onboard Flight Manager in 2001.
Flying as cabin crew is more than just a job, it’s a lifestyle, and one that I loved. Throughout my time with the company, I put my heart and soul into everything that I did. From day one I was I committed to helping the business grow and was driven by a passion for delivering exceptional customer service.
As an Onboard Flight Manager I recognised the importance of building strong relationships, so I worked closely with my team to gain trust and respect. I monitored performance to ensure safety and service procedures were followed and always tried to create a happy working environment.
One aspect of my role that I particularly enjoyed was coaching and performance development. During my time as an Onboard Manager, which included six years as Purser and nineteen as Flight Manager, I wrote and delivered hundreds of performance assessments on cabin crew with whom I worked.
Each one was written with meticulous attention to detail, ensuring that my feedback was not only constructive but also supportive. I never once received criticism for anything that I wrote or the manner in which feedback was delivered.
In 2003, just two years into my new role as Flight Manager, my partner received a devastating diagnosis, and his health deteriorated rapidly. With me being his only family in the UK, it was difficult flying full-time for an airline that only operated long-haul routes.
Being away so often and for at least three days at a time had become really difficult. My partner was spending extensive periods in the hospital, with regular outpatient visits for chemotherapy and countless other appointments, and also required significant help at home. Although part-time work was available for cabin crew, it was almost exclusively offered to those returning from maternity leave.
Believing there was no other option, I informed my manager I was thinking about resigning. He asked me to wait and a few weeks later said he had managed to transfer me to a part-time contract.
Despite the turmoil of the next five years, which had a huge impact on my mental health, I remained loyal and committed to the company and rarely missed a duty.
In performance feedback that was written on me by colleagues during my six years as Purser and nineteen as Flight Manager, I was described as proactive, approachable, a great communicator and someone who thrived on delivering exceptional standards of service.
I took a keen interest in my performance and development and spoke regularly with my manager. We had a friendly and honest relationship, and I was repeatedly told that I was a high-performing member of his team.
In my view, being an effective manager not only involves acknowledging and rewarding exceptional performance but also addressing areas with potential for improvement. During the mandatory Pre-Flight Briefing that takes place prior to each flight, I set clear goals and expectations for the cabin crew with whom I was about to work and monitored their performance and ability on the outbound and return sectors.
In December 2018, I had been rostered a trip over Christmas to Seattle that had a five-day layover. With my dad having recently become extremely frail, I knew he was nearing the end of his life. I therefore didn’t want to be away for so long.
I managed to swap with a colleague for a flight to Atlanta, so instead of being away for five nights, would only be away for two.
In March 2018, I returned to work after being on long-term sick leave for eighteen months. My absence was due to mental health issues as a result of being the sole carer for my dad. He moved in with me after my mum died in 2010, and we had no other family. Although 88 at the time, he was mentally sharp and enjoyed good physical health. However, following a fall in 2016, everything changed.
Returning to work almost two years later was tough, but I couldn’t have been happier being back doing the job I loved. Just eight months later following the Christmas trip to Atlanta that I had swapped onto, an ex-police officer who had joined the airline as Cabin Crew eleven months earlier filed a grievance against me. We had never met previously, and he was still in his probationary period.
Being Cabin Crew…
During my thirty years flying as cabin crew, I can honestly say that I have very few bad memories. However, one incident that took place on a flight from Cape Town stands out vividly in my mind.
A few hours after take-off, a crew member asked me to speak with a customer sitting in the front row of the Premium cabin with her husband. She had repeatedly asked to be upgraded to ‘First’ and refused to take no for an answer.
I noticed this couple when they boarded the aircraft because the gentleman had a spine issue that prevented him from standing up straight.
After I introduced myself as the Flight Manager, the lady told me they wanted to be upgraded so her husband could use the bed. Having explained that I didn’t have the authority to do upgrades, she said they had been upgraded many times before by the Flight Manager.
She told me that as top flying club members, they were entitled to be upgraded. Crouching down in front of her with my back resting against the bulkhead, I explained that wasn’t company policy, and although we do everything possible to accommodate our flying club members, I didn’t have the authority to upgrade.
She went on to say that they had flown out to Cape Town in First Class but were disappointed with the seat, so changed their return flight to Premium. It was their first time travelling in this cabin, and her husband was unable to get comfortable. During our conversation, he appeared oblivious to my presence and continued reading his newspaper.
Despite being empathetic and offering the gentleman a pillow and duvet from First Class, it wasn’t enough. At this point, the company strictly prohibited Flight Managers from upgrading anyone. A few years earlier, a cabin crew member reported a Flight Manager friend of mine for upgrading someone to First. He was subsequently given a disciplinary and almost lost his job.
As the customer’s voice grew louder, she suddenly blurted out, “You have no idea what it’s like to live with someone who’s disabled.” I empathised and explained that I really understood how difficult it was as I had been a carer for my partner for many years. She looked me in the eye and said, “he probably had AIDS.”
Her comment hit me like a ton of bricks, and I struggled to comprehend what I had just heard.
Her comment resonated with me because, at just twenty-six years old, my ex-partner was diagnosed with AIDS. The years that followed were not easy.
Flying as Cabin Crew is a job unlike any other. Although the company was far from perfect, I always felt proud to work for this airline. I can hardly remember a day when I didn’t feel excited about going to work. On every flight that I operated, I tried to do whatever I could to make every customer’s journey special.
People had huge expectations when flying with this company, and it was common to be informed as customers boarded that it was their birthday, anniversary, or honeymoon. The cabin crew would usually take them some champagne after take-off, which was all we could do.
I always carried a pack of congratulations cards, so would write one out using their first name to make it more personal. Customer names appeared with their seat number on the flight manifest. I would then ask all the cabin crew to sign it, and I would deliver it later in the flight with another glass of champagne and some nice chocolates.
There was no requirement for me to carry cards, it was something I did voluntarily. Although a pack of ten wasn’t expensive, I paid for them out of my own pocket, and they didn’t last long, especially on the typical ‘holiday routes’ such as Miami, Orlando and the Caribbean destinations. I know a few other Flight Managers did the same.
Occasionally, I’d extend an invitation for a person or couple to have afternoon tea at the bar area in First Class. I’d serve them myself and spoil them with sandwiches, cakes, and a bottle of champagne on ice. I’ve always gained a considerable amount of pleasure from making people happy.
In 2016, a year before my 50th birthday, I was on long-term sick leave and never believed I’d be well enough to return to work, at least not as a Flight Manager.
Against all odds, in March 2018, after an absence of almost eighteen months, I returned to the job that I loved. Although I was no longer the person I once was, being back on an aircraft was more than I could have wished for.
Settling down into my role was easier than I expected. I loved being back, worked hard, and always tried to lead by example. By nature, I am a bit of a joker and love to make people laugh. Although I expected the cabin crew to work hard, I always tried to create a fun and relaxed working environment.
On 24th December 2018, I arrived at Cabin Crew Check-In at Heathrow Airport for my flight to Atlanta. Little did I know that what should have been a regular day at work would turn into a nightmare. A nightmare that cost me my job and totally destroyed my life.
On that day, I checked in with five of the most despicable people you could ever wish to meet. One of them was Bart, an ex-police officer of eight years. He had joined the airline as Cabin Crew eleven months earlier, had never flown as crew previously, and was nearing the end of his probation period.
Bart’s now ex-fiancée Anna, who was also cabin crew, was rostered to work on the same flight. I didn’t become aware of their relationship until several months later. She joined the airline around the same time as him. Like Bart, Anna was also ex-police, but I don’t know in what capacity she worked. She was good friends with two other crew members who were also rostered to work on our flight.
Having arrived at Cabin Crew Check-In, I signed in and went to sit in a quiet area of the lounge to begin my pre-flight paperwork. The Flight Manager was responsible for assigning onboard working positions to each crew member.
I had only flown previously with one of the eleven cabin crew and didn’t know anyone else. Seeing that Bart was relatively new, I allocated him a position in First Class. Working in this cabin meant he would be working alongside me and four other crew members.
My first encounter with Bart was during the Cabin Crew Preflight Briefing. This gathering, led by the Flight Manager, is the first time the entire crew get together before going to the aircraft. Having advised Bart of his working position and asked whether he had worked in First Class before, he confirmed that he had many times.
Although I only spoke with him briefly, I found him aloof and unfriendly, which is unusual for cabin crew. I initially put it down to shyness.
Working alongside Bart on the outbound flight to Atlanta and the return flight to Heathrow the following day, I had to address several performance-related issues with him. Part of my role as a Flight Manager was to ensure the cabin crew carried out their duties to standard and in line with company procedures.
With him still being in his probation period, I decided to write performance feedback that discussed everything that I had seen. Several weeks later, I learned that he had raised a grievance against me for bullying, harassment and overbearing supervision. He also accused me of inappropriate touching towards him and other crew members. He made twenty separate complaints about my performance, ability and conduct.
Despite the seriousness of the inappropriate touching allegation, Bart didn’t mention it to anyone during the trip or speak with his manager upon returning home. Despite proving beyond reasonable doubt that he, his ex-fiancée Anna, and four other crew members with whom they colluded were lying, the allegations were upheld. In fact, the company refused to believe almost everything that I said in my defence.
As my story progresses, you’ll begin to see that Bart is a devious, malicious narcissist unwilling to accept any form of constructive feedback. His background as a police officer enabled him to manipulate the truth and portray himself as the victim. Understanding the importance of witnesses to support his complaint, he colluded with at least three other crew members.
With our Atlanta trip being away over Christmas Day, some of the cabin crew had requested the flight to enable them to be together. Bart requested it with his now ex-fiancée Anna, and coincidentally, three of her friends had also been rostered on the trip.
As part of the investigation into the grievance, the company requested a witness statement from each crew member on the flight. In one response in her witness statement, Anna mentions Bart’s “excellent memory.” His “excellent memory”, along with his police training, enabled him to cunningly manipulate every interaction that occurred between us. This made defending myself against his malicious lies extremely difficult.
The following excerpt comes from Anna’s witness statement. During the flight, she was based in the galley at the back of a very long aircraft. She only came to the front where Bart and I were working once, and that was on our return sector to Heathrow. The flight time to Atlanta is just over nine hours, the return flight to the UK is slightly shorter. Having arrived in the front galley, Anna stayed for just a couple of minutes.
Bart is not this person’s real name. CM is an abbreviation for Cabin Crew, Workplace is the company’s online communications platform (similar to Facebook). “Instantly Inspired” is a reward given as a token of appreciation for outstanding service. FSM is an abbreviation for Flight Service Manager (aka Flight Manager) which was my rank.
Throughout her statement, Anna addressed Bart as “CM” followed by his surname. She addressed me as “FSM”, followed by my surname. In all other references that involved crew members, she used their first name.
In witness statements received by the company, as well as Bart, crew members Anna, Mia and a male crew member whom I’ve called Ven also accused me of inappropriate touching.
The witness statements submitted by those who supported Bart’s allegations were riddled with lies and inconsistencies. It wasn’t difficult to see that collusion had taken place. Anna and Ven’s witness statements were so venomous that even now, almost four years later, I struggle to read them.
In contrast, the remaining witness statements written by the three crew members who worked alongside Bart and me in First Class, plus those written by the Captain and First Officer, were honest, generally accurate, and told a completely different story.
My defence included more than six hundred pages of evidence, many of which proved that Bart, Anna, Ven, Mia, and a crew member who I’ve called Peter, were lying. However, the Cabin Crew Managers who dealt with the grievance and the Head of Cabin Crew refused to believe my version of events.
Bart, Anna, Mia, and Peter had been with the airline for less than twelve months. Ven had been with the airline for four years. He joined our flight after being called from standby. Crew on ‘standby’ duties replace those who call in sick on the day of departure. Another crew member, Tommy, had been with the company for a similar length of time as Ven but was on his first operating flight back after being on a ground placement for a year.
The following paragraph comes from Ven’s witness statement. Anna was Bart’s fiancée, not his wife. Ven had never flown with anyone on the crew previously but socialised extensively with Bart, Anna, and several other crew members during the layover.
“Down route” is a term used to describe the destination of the layover, which on this trip was Atlanta.
Four crew members worked alongside Bart and me in First Class. Lottie was the most experienced, having been with the airline for eight years. Katrina and Claire had been with the company for just over a year, while Bruce had been with the company for about four years. There were eleven crew members operating the flight plus myself, the Captain and First Officer.
Best friends Katrina and Claire requested the trip, so they could be away together over Christmas. Before joining the company, they worked at another airline for thirty years. They were both onboard managers for twenty years before being made redundant.
Despite statements written by Lottie, Claire, and Katrina telling a completely different story from the one told by Bart and those who supported him, the company took no notice of anything they said. Bruce failed to return his statement.
Bart submitted his grievance to his manager more than three weeks after the flight. It was almost four months before the company requested witness statements from the operating crew. During that time, each crew member would have flown to various destinations whilst working each time with a different team of cabin crew. Most cabin crew do five or six flights a month. One flight involves an outbound and inbound sector separated by at least one local night at the destination.
The crew on my Atlanta trip were asked to respond to more than thirty questions about my performance, ability, and conduct. The questions were based on Bart’s allegations. One question was, “Please share any observations you have about Laurence and his physical touching towards either yourself or any of the cabin crew throughout the flight.”
This is a leading question because it implies that physical touching took place and prompts the respondent to provide information that supports that presumption. To maintain neutrality, questions must be phrased without presupposing any specific behaviour.
A more appropriate question would have been, “Please share any observations about Laurence’s interactions or conduct towards you or any of the cabin crew throughout the flight.”
Out of eleven questionnaires, which included the Captain and First Officer, nine were returned.
As part of my defence, I asked a doctor of clinical psychology to write to the manager handling the grievance. The letter would prove without any doubt that Bart, Anna, Mia, and Ven’s allegations of inappropriate touching were lies.
I had been seeing him for several months, and during our sessions, I’d spoken extensively about something I had struggled with my entire life. I believe it stems from a physically abusive relationship I was in when I was eighteen. Without going into more detail than necessary, I find physical contact that could be perceived as affectionate extremely difficult.
It had taken me almost thirty years to finally address this issue, and I was now being forced to share this intensely private information with my employer in an attempt to clear my name.
This next paragraph comes from Bart’s complaint. The paragraph after that is from the outcome of my appeal that was heard by the Head of Cabin Crew several months later.
A/C means aircraft.
The doctor I was seeing is a Consultant Clinical and Counselling Psychologist and an Associate Fellow of the British Psychological Society. He is a registered Applied Practitioner Psychologist with the Health and Care Professions Council. He’s been in practice for more than thirty years and has the following letters after his name; BA (Hons), MSc Med Psych, DClinPsych, CPsychol, AFBPsS.
The Head of Cabin Crew joined the airline in 2007 and moved into her current role in 2014. According to her LinkedIn profile, she has nine ‘O’ levels, including English and Maths, and an ‘A’ level in English literature. Despite not having any qualifications in psychology, she believes that she knows better than an experienced clinical psychologist.
In my defence, I proved unequivocally that the three crew members who accused me of inappropriate touching had lied throughout their statements. I also proved beyond reasonable doubt that collusion had occurred, yet it made no difference.
Nobody had been touched inappropriately. The only physical contact I’d had was when I touched Ven’s ankle for a split second while playing a joke on him. In their witness statements, the three crew members who worked alongside Bart and me on both sectors of our flight stated they were unaware of any inappropriate touching at any time. The Captain and First Officer also denied knowledge of any inappropriate behaviour or touching.
Out of eleven witness statements, the only person who claimed that she saw me touch someone inappropriately was Bart’s fiancée Anna, who was working at the opposite end of the aircraft.
This next paragraph comes from her witness statement. For reference, I’m five foot seven. Bart is over six feet.
FSM is an abbreviation for Flight Service Manager, CM is Crew Member in reference to Bart. My surname and Bart’s have been redacted.
I believe the Head of Cabin Crew was determined to have the inappropriate touching allegation upheld. She never expected to receive a letter from a clinical psychologist stating that it was unlikely I would touch anyone in this way. As such, she was left with no choice but to claim his opinion was not correct.
Her comment that my ‘physical contact’ made those concerned feel uncomfortable refers solely to Bart’s allegations in his grievance and responses in witness statements written by his fiancée Anna and also Ven.
With regard to tickling someone’s leg, this is what happened. Towards the end of our inbound flight to Heathrow, I was on my hands and knees sweeping the carpet with a dustpan and brush after the breakfast service in First Class. Ven and Katrina were sitting side-by-side on stools at the First Class bar. As I passed behind them, they were not aware of my presence, so I reached out and touched Ven’s ankle (over his sock) to give him a fright. I touched Ven’s ankle instead of Katrina’s because he was closer to me.
Ven used the word “tickled” in his witness statement, but I wouldn’t describe touching someone’s leg for a split second with your forefinger as tickling. Crew member Lottie was standing next to them when the incident took place. This is from her witness statement:
“Laurence appeared to me to be in very high spirits towards the end of the inbound sector and was laughing and joking with the crew.”
Although Bart was not present, Ven must have told him what took place, and I believe it was because of this incident that he came up with the idea of accusing me of inappropriate touching. He just needed to persuade other crew members to support his story.
After I touched Ven’s ankle, he gave no indication that he was upset by what had taken place. Having witnessed what had happened, Katrina, Lottie, and several passengers who were in the area waiting to use the toilets all laughed. Ven also laughed and said, “You gave me such a fright.”
Had Ven been upset by what had taken place, there was ample time for him to speak with me. If he didn’t feel comfortable doing that, he could have spoken to the Captain or to his manager upon returning home. He said nothing to anyone until he was asked to submit a witness statement more than three months later.
In his statement, Ven also accused me of squeezing his waist and, in a subsequent response, said he did not see me touching anyone inappropriately.
Katrina also confirmed in her witness statement that she was unaware of any inappropriate touching.
Flying as cabin crew, you have to make friends quickly. You can fly with someone once and never see them again. Spending ten hours together on an aircraft whilst working in a confined space provides plenty of opportunities to chat and get to know each other. Considering so much ‘inappropriate touching’ was allegedly happening, out of thirteen operating crew including the Captain and First Officer, only Bart and Anna claimed they had witnessed it. In fact, they were the only two who were even aware of it.
That said, Peter mentioned inappropriate touching in his witness statement, although he says he didn’t see it personally. As you’ll see in the next paragraph, Mia’s witness statement exposed his lies.
Mia and Peter were best friends out of work. They were based in the galley at the back of the aircraft working alongside Anna, another crew member who didn’t return her witness statement, and Tommy. In his witness statement, Peter stated that he had been told by Mia that I had been “quite physical on a few occasions”. In Mia’s witness statement, she accused me of touching her leg while she was helping with the service in First Class. She then says, “I don’t want this to be taken further”. She also stated she did not see me or was aware of me touching anyone inappropriately at any time.
As well as being best friends with Peter, Mia is also good friends with Anna.
As my story progresses, you’ll see extracts from all of their witness statements, as well as Bart’s original grievance. You’ll also see how the company dealt with this matter and what a shambles the investigation was.
In May 2020, when redundancies were announced, I was informed that my job was at risk. I was on long-term sick leave once again because my mental health had deteriorated as a result of dealing with this spurious grievance. I had been off work for almost five months.
My employment was terminated in September 2020. When my P45 arrived in the post, nothing was attached to it, and there was nothing else in the envelope.
It had been several months since I had spoken with my manager or anyone else in the company. The last email I received was an ‘invitation’ to appeal the decision to make me redundant. For reasons that will become clear later in my story, I declined the offer.
That is how my thirty-year career with the airline came to an end.
Being Cabin Crew | The Ugly Truth 